It's hard....

This week was difficult.
I had jury duty Mon- Thurs. I tried very hard to be a good American and do the right thing but it was hard because I had so much to do. It started making me grumpy. But then I would remember that this was someones life that I was making a decision about and I would feel guilty. On top of that I had Frappuccino training and Thursday, Friday and Saturday. Plus new extra responsibilities in the job.
All of this combined did not help my eating. At the courthouse I ate a lot of junk. The cafeteria did not have the best choices.
I have a cold now and feel like crap. At least it's helping me not eat too much. I'm taking a 2 hour break today and turning off all electronics. No laptop, no computer, no phone, no TV, no music. Just 2 hours of reading.

I walked the dogs yesterday for 2 miles. The weather is so gorgeous that I'm going to repeat that walk today. I am committing to using that treadmill again. With this extra stress I need to do something or I will just eat non-stop. Maybe it's time to go back to yoga! The Wii fit is getting kind of dusty also. Too many choices.

It Friday!

Wow! It seemed to get here fast this week. I was on Jury duty Wednesday and Thursday so it made the week kinda weird. I will remain in Jury duty all of next week and possibly the following week. The drag is that the job doesn't stop. It just means working in the evening and weekends. I have to go to Fresno on Sunday for training. At least I get Saturday as a day off :)
Food wasn't great this week. I didn't go nuts. I was very aware of what I ate and I walked the dogs every day except today (it was raining.) I walked them at least a mile and 2 days I did 2 miles. I'll get in 2 miles tomorrow but Sunday is out of the question. Next week I have to get the eating under control. No more girl scout cookies! I had my first glass of wine in 2 weeks on Thursday. It was delicious! I'm stuck on the Husch Pinot Noir. A little bit of heaven in a glass.
Since it is Friday, it is time to be grateful. I'm grateful I made it through another week. I'm grateful for my 2 sweet dogs. I'm grateful my managers are self sufficient and I don't worry about them when I can't be in the store. I'm grateful that I have a super comfortable bed and it's calling my name.....

I'm tired

Wow. It was a tough week back. Nothing bad just hard to catch up after being gone for a week. I am very happy it is Friday. I didn't get back on the diet but I did pretty good this week.... NO WINE or CHEESE. I don't know that I'll be drinking wine for a while. I did have a couple of beers/ciders the other night when I went out for a drink and then tonight I had a beer. Not too bad. The only bad thing I really ate all week was girl scout cookies. I bought some boxes of Thin MInts and I can't stop eating them. I should just toss them in the garbage but I can't. I love the thin mints.
This weekend I have to clean my filthy house. My suitcase is still on the floor wide open. CLothes piled places. The kitchen a mess. Uggghhh. I'm going to clean and pay bills. Maybe clean out the fridge and buy some good healthy food for this week.
Today as I was driving through Stockton I saw the guy in the pickle suit dancing on the side of the road. FOllowing that I saw the gal wearing the statue of liberty suit. Right away, I knew what I was grateful for this Friday. I am very grateful that I don't have that job! Whenever I feel frustrated with my job, I'm going to remember those folks and say a little prayer of thanks that I don't have to wear a costume and dance for cars :)

I'm back!

Sorry I didn't post while on vacation. I forgot to take my password and then decided it could just wait. It was a wonderful vacation. My friend Rob and I rented a delightful little cottage in downtown Napa. Super cute and perfect for 2 people. We had a great week of wine tasting, eating and just goofing off. The only downside is that there was a lot of work talk. It's hard to stay off of your e-mail with these darn phones! I also guess that is one of the bad things about vacationing with someone you work with.
Since this blog is suppose to be about my great eating habits, let me tell you what happened. They all went out the window! We had a ton of cheese, wine and chocolate. I wish I could say it wasn't true but it is. I have never had so much wine, good wine, in my life. At the end of the week we had 14 bottles to throw in the garbage and that doesn't count the wine in restaurants and wine tastings. Holy cow! I might need an intervention. I think I will not drink for a very long time. There are just so many great wineries in Napa that you just get wrapped up in it and next thing you know, you have bought a few bottles. Then a few bottles turn into a case, etc, etc. I came home with 10 bottles of really good wine. That should last me all year. Of course when you drink, you must eat cheese. We spent a fortune on cheese. And not a small fortune. Then one night I made a chocolate pudding cake and then another night I made a chocolate tart. Then I found a cupcake shop. Then I found another cupcake shop. You can see where this is headed.

I came home happy and fat! I'm not lying when I tell you that I stepped on the scale this morning and it was 5 lbs heavier. I'm not surprised. But I've already started to make a change. This evening I walked the dogs 2 miles. I felt like napping but I knew I had to. THis week I am going back to yoga and turning on the Wii fit. I will drop these 5 lbs and 10 more on top of it.

I hope everyone else is doing well. It's been kinda quiet out there!

Vacation

Not a bad week. It is gratitude Friday and I can easily say what I am grateful for today. Vacation!! I start vacation in the morning. I am beat!! It has been almost 8 months since the last vacation and I need it. I still have a ton to do this evening and in the morning. About a dozen e-mails to send, pay bills, pick up the house, pack, do laundry, etc. But, I have 3 hours tonight and till noon tomorrow. Plan to hit the road by 1pm and drive to Napa. Can't wait. We have rented a delightful little cottage and I plan to read, eat and drink all week. I'm taking 5 books. I will probably not make it through all of them but that's okay. I think I'm also taking the Wii so that maybe I'll workout a bit.
The eating this week was pretty good. Not great. But plan to be aware while on vacation. That doesn't mean I'll be dieting but I will be careful.
I'm grateful for my dog sitter Rory. Thanks to her I won't worry about the boys while I'm gone. I'm grateful for a district full of capable managers so that I won't worry while I'm gone.
I'll update from the vineyard!

New day

Yesterday was a really good food day. I wouldn't say that I did much dieting but I didn't eat bad either. I was really aware of everything I put in my mouth and didn't snack like usual. I went to the mall last night to pick up a couple of things and I made a point of taking a 100 calorie breakfast bar with me. I know what usually happens is I go and get hungry. Next thing I know I'm eating some bad mall food and feeling terrible. This time I ate the breakfast bar and then came home and had a half a baked sweet potato, peas and some salad. Plus, I walked the dogs 2 miles. The weather was so fabulous that it was a great walk.
I think today,I'll add a mile to that walk. They haven't gone 3 miles in a very long time! Their little legs will be tired which is a good thing. They sleep well when they are tired. Of course the truth is that they sleep all the time even if they didn't walk. But I sleep better.
Today's activities include a trip to the grocery store. I need some fresh veggies because the refrigerator is looking a little empty.
One week till vacation! Can't wait.
oh... for those of you keeping track.... I bought a fabulous skirt, pair of pants and 3 very cute shirts at the mall. Plus some new lipstick. I stayed far away from the shoe department because I am trying to break my shoe addiction. Once I realized I had passed the 50 pairs mark, I realized it need to stop.

Gratitude Friday

It's Gratitude Friday. It's been such a long week that I wasn't sure what I was grateful for today. But, the minute I walked in the front door I had my answer. There waiting for me were my boys. Those 2 furry four legged boys are waiting for me everyday with a smile on their face. When I arrive they dance around and bark and jump and act like it is Christmas. They are just so happy to see me. I always walk in and act surprised to see them. It is our usual routine. Me-- "Well what a surprise! Who knew there would be dogs waiting to see me!" Them- bark, bark, bark. It never gets old. I love that they are beyond happy. I love that they wake up happy. I love that when I pull out their leashes, they go insane. I love that when I open the dog food, they dance around. I love that they snuggle up next to me and are happy just to be in my presence.
I think we could all take a lesson from our dogs :~)

long day

Holy cow this was a long day. It was our monthly Fresno meeting today which means leaving the house at 5:30 to get to Fresno in time. Then got back home at 7:30 this evening. Needless to say I ate terrible. I mean terrible. I started off well with a banana and yogurt but then had Chipolte for lunch with a cupcake and French onion soup & salad for dinner. Oh.. and a couple of onion rings. Plus, 2 beers. Not good. Yesterday was pretty good all day and MOnday was decent. The worse part is that I weighed myself on MOnday and I was a lb heavier than last week. I thought it was a mistake so I waited and weighed myself again on Tuesday and sure enough, it is a lb heavier. Yuck. I have got to get serious about this challenge. I'm running out of clothes to wear. Once my summer clothes come out of the closet they are not going to fit over my fat rear. I'm so exhausted!!! I have vacation coming up in just over a week and I am ready. Tomorrow is a new day. I vow to eat healthy all day. Plus, I'm going to walk the dogs tomorrow, unless it's raining again.
I might just have to break down and buy some clothes that fit. Ugghhh.

Gratitude

It's Gratitude Friday!
I feel really grateful for my health. For all of the complaining I do about feeling old, I know I am really fortunate that I am in great health. I have had no major illnesses, I can run/ walk/ exercise. I am fairly strong physically and mentally. I'm not depressed, in fact I'm pretty darned happy. I don't have high blood pressure. I might need to drop a few pounds but I'm not obese. Overall I'm doing okay for an old broad. In yoga we hug ourselves at the end of glass and say thank you to our bodies for allowing us to practice for an hour. I am thankful. In return I should be picker about what I put into my body. No junk food, no processed crap, not so much alcohol (Notice I didn't say no alcohol). This week I will practice gratitude to my body.

The dream

The last 2 days were not great. I didn't really try. I didn't do anything terrible or eat anything too awful, but I didn't put a real effort into it.
But last night I dreamed that I was all skinny and running this marathon. (some other weird stuff also happened like my dogs were dancing but that's not really the point of this post.) I woke up this morning and thought, I need to get moving. I was thinking back to 3 summers ago when I was running and how good I felt. I was 1-2 sizes smaller and I felt really confident in my clothes. Now I feel like everything is tight. I want to get back to the confident part.
The last a few days have also been tough because I had bad PMS and was torn between punching someone and eating a giant hot fudge sundae. I didn't do either but I need to figure out how to get that under control also. And the rain makes it really difficult to get those dog walks in. When the weather is nice, I come home and walk them right away. Sometimes that gets me motivated to do the treadmill or something else. When the weather is bad, I come home and plop down on the sofa. Ugggghhh.
Today is the first day of the rest of my life!

48 hours

Well.. the last 48 hours have not been good. Don't get me wrong, I've had a great 2 days and lot's of fun but I have eaten everything in sight. I could start a new blog of everything I ate. I won't list all of the details here but I'll give a brief overview. It all started with my book group on Friday. There were 12 of us and we had a blast. (You can see the link for the book group listed with my blogs.) We meet once a month and discuss the book of the month and bring a dish that goes with the book. Of course that means lots of food. Plus lots of wine. It was all delicious. Then on Saturday I headed to San Jose to visit one of my dearest friends Sasha. (that's Sasha in the photo with me in Vegas 2 yrs ago.) Now Sasha and I have discussed diets, weight loss, body image issues, etc. for years. The funny thing is that we usually do it over some fabulous decadent dinner. We love to find new restaurants and go nuts. She is the only person I know who doesn't flinch when the bill shows up. So as usual, we went to a new place in Los Gatos, Cin Cin wine bar. http://cincinwinebar.com/ The food was delicious but the dessert.... OMG! We had Cheesecake Beignets. Yes, fried doughnuts with cheesecake inside.
Now, if all of that wasn't bad enough, the next morning we met up with another good friend, Tamara, for breakfast. I had 2 eggs, bacon and a WAFFLE. I drove home feeling guilty and determined to do better. But then I walked in the door and there in the kitchen were cupcakes. Yes, Rory, my dog sitter extraordinaire, had made cupcakes for a baby shower. She left a dozen bite size cupcakes for me. Of course I had to try a couple just to make sure they weren't poisonous.
The only bright spot was that I felt so full that I walked the dogs for 2 miles.
Tomorrow is a new day. A new beginning. I need to get rid of those cupcakes!

walking

Well... I'm not going to talk about yesterday. I didn't feel like I did a good job. a lot of snacking. but today is a new day.
I had 2 cereal bars for breakfast. One just isn't enough. Plus my usual coffee. For lunch I had a SBUX turkey and swiss sandwich. In the evening I had one of our banana mango squeeze packs on the drive home. Tonight I had salmon, broccoli and a sweet potato. I ate like an entire head of broccoli!! I was so hungry. A whole head of broccoli will make me full of toxic fumes. I know.... too much information. I'm bad at doing that.
So the food wasn't too bad but the good thing is the walking. I got home at 4:30 and even though I still had a couple of hours of work to do, I decided to take the dogs for a long walk since the weather was actually nice. I have several different dog walks that I do and I have mapped them out so I know how long they are. I took the dogs on the 2 mile walk. I got home and worked for a couple of hours and then at 8pm I closed the laptop. I put the sweet potato in the oven and pulled out the treadmill. I walked on the treadmill for 30 minutes. Put up the treadmill and ate dinner. I felt really good that I did a total of 3.5 miles today. And I didn't have my glass of wine! I decided it was so late that I would just hold off until the weekend.
So, a few bright spots for the day. Tomorrow will be a long day of driving in the foothills.

Day 1

I'm not sure it was a good day... food wise that is.
I started off pretty good, went bad and then good again. Several problems I am facing; 1. I wait until I'm really hungry to eat and then I make bad choices. I know that is not the way to do it. They say to eat small meals throughout the day so that you are never starving. I just forget. 2. I eat something bad and then I just decide that it ruins the day and I might as well eat bad for the rest of the day and start over the next day. I also know this isn't smart. Just because I eat something I shouldn't, doesn't mean I should just go nuts for the rest of the day.
3. I'm not willing to give up the glass of wine in the evening. I love my glass of wine. I justify it as good for my health. But, I find that once I have that glass of wine, I start making bad food choices. IF I have 2 glasses, things really go downhill.
So today I started with 2 packs of instant cream of wheat and 3 cups of coffee. Not too bad. around 10am I had a cereal bar. Still not bad. But then the conference calls started. I was starving during my 11am call. It ran long and when I got off of the call I only had 15 minutes until my 1230 call. So I grabbed the leftover macaroni and cheese that was enough for 2 meals and ate all of it while on my 2nd call. I felt really guilty the entire time I was eating it ;( I need to drop the guilt. Then I had a couple of other calls and headed down to Stockton. Finished my P&AP investigation and decided that I was too hungry to drive all the way home without eating. I knew I would do fast food if I didn't eat. I got our fruit and cheese plate which is 380 calories. But I didn't eat the crackers. Just the fruit and cheese. I'm hoping that at least saved the 80 calories. Ugggh. I got home and was still hungry. I think I have a tape worm!!! I just now ate a piece of salmon that had a soy sauce glaze, a spinach salad (just spinach, pear and 1 triangle of 30 calorie laughing cow cheese.) and some sauteed asparagus. Now if I can just make it through the night without eating anything else, I'll be good.
No exercise today. It was raining when I got home so I couldn't walk the dogs. I have 2 more hours of work to do before I can call it a night. The wii fit will have to wait until tomorrow.
uggghhhh this is hard.

The first day

I like to start everyday by saying "Today is the first day of the rest of my life". Because it is! My team has decided to start a weight loss challenge. We will see who can lose the highest percentage of weight over a 3 month period. The weigh in starts on Monday. A few folks have already started and a few folks are packing it on this week to get ready to start. I'm doing neither. I kinda started a couple of weeks ago by being aware of what I was eating and trying to get back in the habit of walking the dogs. I even got the Wii Fit. But, I haven't lost anything. I also haven't gained. I'm just hanging in there. While I think I've been aware, I haven't really made an effort. This week, the effort starts. I'm cleaning out the refrigerator this weekend. I'm dusting off the treadmill. I'm planning out my week to have a little work life balance. My problem is that I sit in front of the TV with my laptop and remain there for several hours. I need to close the laptop and only watch TV when I'm on the treadmill. I also need to get my rear back to yoga. That alone sweats out lbs.
My goals are not as much about the number of pounds but fitting into my clothes and feeling comfortable. All of my clothes are super tight now and I only have 3 pairs of pants left that actually fit. Not good. Plus, this summer I have a family vacation coming up that involves the beach. We all know what that means.
I am going to try to post thoughts and reflections at least 3 times a week on this site. I will also track my teammates progress and comment. We are going to be successful!
so we begin....